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  • Writer's pictureLaura Doughty

Tony Robbins I "I Am Not Your Guru"

My review of the Tony Robbins documentary


This quote is from the documentary and it is the definition of Live Excellence. But Tony is excellence in motion, so I would expect nothing less.

“Every day, work harder on yourself than anything else. ‘Cause if you become more intelligent, more valuable, more skilled, you can add more value to other people.” - Tony Robbins

In today’s episode, I’m giving you my review of the recently released documentary on Tony Robbins – I Am Not Your Guru.   Tony and the work he has done definitely exemplifies excellence, but when you know his back story and see how he uses that pain to help others, it’s beyond excellence – it’s transformative.  My father got me hooked on Tony Robbins when I was very young and this film helped me see the person I wouldn’t have otherwise known by investing in his programs. This Netflix Original allows you to go behind the scenes of his annual mega event – Date with Destiny.  The documentary starts off with a bang - within the first two minutes he is addressing a man's issue with perfectionism

Warning for those of you who have an issue with people who use curse words. Tony Robbins uses them in full affect. If you are one of those people then you probably will not like the movie nor will you like me. I refrain on my podcast for the purpose of those of you I want to respect. But truth be told, businesses insider just released a study regarding the level of intelligence of those that do use curse words. So before you judge review the article. Now back to Tony and Date w/Destiny

Over 4 million pp have been to one of his events

Date w/Destiny is offered One time per year with a price tag of around $5000 for the 6 day event. Over 2500 in attendance from 71 countries.

He intensely used affirmations to get out of where he was born. He created the Tony Robbins that we all know

Day one - preparation day

Our entire life changes in a moment

What he does himself, his staff - the synchronicity of it all - His preparation includes him jumping on a trampoline, breathing exercises, voice exercises, meditation and then he immerses   himself in a cold plunge pool at 57°

The energy even from just watching the film is beyond electric when he steps on the stage for the first time.

One of my favorite moments in the entire movie is in the beginning on day one. He ask a question to the audience wanting to know what do they want to see changed in their life. A 19-year-old girl from California stands up and begins to tell him that she wants to see a change in her diet.  Through a series and what I see as a layers of questioning he gets to the true core of what she truly wants to see changed in her life.

What started out as I desire to change her diet, Tony gets her to reveal that the core of her need her desire is to receive the love that she never received from her father. That was because her father is a drug addict

The tools he gave her were profound.  Challenged her to do more than she was comfortable with.

Tony sees Problems as what make us grow and sculpt our soul.

He tells the girl that Rejection breeds obsession

Day 2: Evaluation Day

Push will wear you out

They get into teams on Day 2 for more specialized attention.  They followed up w/the teenager who reached out to her drug addicted father to find out they had communicated and he was even texting her telling her how much he loved her but appreciated and needed her.

Tony addresses why he uses the extreme language he does. He says that in every culture there are taboo words and  when you use them you are able interrupt the noise in people's heads.

I want to provoke people back into the reality of this moment. That's how you they change.

In day two after doing an intervention with a woman who was in a relationship and being more in the masculine role and gets her to reveal the fact that the relationship isn't what she should be doing, Tony talks about how he pays attention to people's body language and when he sees an opening he follows the vein to the core of their soul. Because he feels that we live on the surface of our lives that we text instead of call, and we think our Facebook friends are really our friends. He likes to take people deep.  Because when they go deep, everyone is riveted and impacted.

Day 3: Discovery Day

We all get what we tolerate

For me Day three is a reality check for most people. It starts out in a training meeting for all of the team leaders in addressing any of the red flag participants that are in each of their groups. They begin to go around the room and discuss the issues the different people are having and how they're going to support them with those issues. When you hear the list of horrific and torturous events that some of these red flag people are dealing with or have dealt with growing up, it's truly astounding. With all of that troubling information, the head trainer tells the group that they need to focus on how they can make an impact on the lives of these people and not focus on the negative events that they've already experienced. That in and of itself is such a profound way of addressing any issue in our life. To see that Tony has a team with the depth of insight at this level speaks volumes as to why he has such an impact on people at these events.

The day offers A testimony that I will not share even one hint of what it's about here on this podcast. But what I can tell you is that if all you do is watch this 15 minutes of this movie you will forever be changed.

Truly powerful and moving!

Day 4: Relationship Day

Heal the boy and the man will appear

It's a perfect start to a day, Tony comes to the stage and tells you that you can meditate you can go off to a cave and be by yourself but if you really want to grow spiritually then get in a relationship. That's where you'll really be challenged.

He asks people what is their vision for their relationship. He goes out into the audience to have them share their vision and uses husband-and-wife to tell a fable about a lion who was brought up as a lamb and compares it to how many men have forgotten who they are as men.

When asked why he includes this relationship day as a part of the event he says its because he doesn't want people going home and interacting with their spiritual partners and not be equipped to handle life together on the same newfound terms. Appropriate for this section of the event, the producers interview his wife (insert name! and she says that she is asked all the time if he is like this when no one else is around. And she responds emphatically that he is every bit like this and more when no one else is around and behind closed doors - he lives this life.

Day 5: Transformation Day

Stay in your head, you're dead.

As Tony describes it, this day is the day that they will all redesign their destiny.

On this day, they write down their mission.  What they are here to do and what they are here to be.  He has them make these decisions and create a vision board around this.  This may sound simple but you can see in the documentary how people devote a great deal of care in putting thought and attention to what they document about themselves.

Tony believes that people do not want to stay where they are because life is growth.  Progress equals happiness.

Day 6: Integration Day

We are meant to grow so we have something to give.

On this day Tony gives them the tools to take the things they've learned in the past five days and implement them into their lives moving forward. He gives them rituals and systems in order that they may create a new habit from this experience.

They redesign their lives at this stage and Tony tells them that with these new values they are going to see things they've never seen or felt before.


Destiny is who are you going to become and what are you going to give in this life. Tony says we are too busy with life that we don't take time to design our life.

One of my most cherished moments in watching this documentary was towards the end when the producer asked Tony about a moment in his life when everything really changed. Tony reflected back to a time when he was in school and a teacher saw something in him that Tony was unaware of. Not only did the teacher see his incredible gift as a communicator but he saw his heart and how he could be healed through the use of his gift.

Tony goes on to explain, with tears in his eyes, that even now that moment in his life still moves him because he realizes that that was a moment of grace. He didn't design that. He didn't create that for himself.  It's his knowing that there is something bigger than him that moves this world.


He sends them off with the directive to make their life a masterpiece.

In the closing credits you are given updates on the people that shared their stories and with which you shared a piece of their journey. The most touching and true evidence of grace was the update on the 19 yr old girl from California from the first day. After connecting with her father while at Date w/Destiny, she was able to spend more time with him in the months following and you'll have to watch in order to find out where grace shows up.

In conclusion, the producer asks Tony what he hopes people will get from watching the film.  His response, maybe they'll see people transforming their lives and they'll reflect and begin to think what's possible for them.

Desire accomplished Mr Tony Robbins.  Thank you for allowing the producers to peek into your world of date with destiny.

Thank you for showing us that true change is possible and it is a real thing that can happen for any of us.


Oh, wait, just when you think it's over there's a bonus section. It's a powerful punch and as with anything Tony Robbins he over delivers on everything.

It's a must watch on Netflix for sure!!  5 stars of Excellence all the way!

Thank you for joining me and until next time, Live Excellence!

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